Love "Entitlement"

 During yesterday's panel discussion on love and compassion, one of the participant in the audience, a therapist, raised the interesting question of how people who have never been loved before in any kind of depth can feel loved by their teachers and peers, let alone extend love to others. This question is interesting because it does raise the point, how can a person know that the love (or lack thereof) they receive (or don't receive) is a true reflection of their belonging in the universe? This amounts to saying: how much love are young people "entitled" to receive from others in classroom situations?
  In fact, my question is a little bit of a trick one, because I am not even sure myself whether it's appropriate to speak of "entitled' or lack thereof when it comes to being loved in classrooms. First of all, teachers are under no obligation to treat their students in a "loving" way that students feel is "truly love". Even if teachers could know with any precision how the students want to feel loved, there is little likelihood that a class of 30 or so students is going to be able to receive that kind of attention from their teachers.
   Secondly, there is never a precise measure for what is "due" to the other in relationships. Once two or more people are willing to face each other and help, then the matter of what is "due" for each person is naturally negotiated, and that relationship will change over time. In the beginning, relationships can be tenuous, because we don't precisely know how to treat each other. Both students and teachers come into the class with their own baggage, so naturally they will feel nervous to know how their needs are met together. If either the teacher or the student is not truly present in the classroom, then there isn't enough energy for either to provide kindness or attention.
   What can teachers do in these situations, then? I think the attitude of open heart is so crucial here. I wonder if that might take the form of a simple faith that all sentient beings need a certain amount of love and support and this in itself warrants attention, even though specific needs might remain unmet in the process. Through this faith, I may not be able to please everyone, but at least i am open to my own vulnerability to needing acceptance and love. This brings me closer to others and allows me to see the suffering that others go through when they don't receive needed attention or help.