Self Affirmation

Self affirmation, according to Master Sheng Yen, is not simply about affirming "me" over the others. Interestingly in his video (which I have pasted below), he speaks to the contrary tendency to actually affirm both others and the self in sense of responsibility. This is not easy, but as Master Sheng Yen remarks, how can we possibly know ourselves (strengths, weaknesses, etc) unless we are interacting with others? It's only ever in the context of other beings that we can speak of taking responsibility. This certainly does remind me of Wenger's thoughts around communities of learning, for precisely the similar reason of seeing our identities as coming out of interactions with groups.
  Why call this "affirmation" when a person is acknowledging both strengths and weaknesses? How is admitting one's mistakes and weaknesses a form of affirmation? I think this is a tricky thing because in Western culture, being "affirmative" is often equated with only showing one's "positive" traits. We are told on interviews to be careful not to show our failings or weaknesses, and even then to be careful how we phrase it. But as Master Sheng Yen suggests, it's in clearly recognizing weaknesses that one can actually work with them and prevent them from becoming destructive. If my weakness is about sleeping in late, I make it an extra precaution to make myself wake up and not hit the snooze button. Knowing my tendency to want to sleep longer makes me make the extra steps to counterbalance that tendency.
    Conversely, bringing up weaknesses with the intention of "putting oneself down" is not really the attitude that Master Sheng Yen wants to promote. Self-deprecation does not represent a balanced view of one's traits, and therefore has a tendency to lead a person to inactivity. Again, balance is important: nobody is "all bad", any more than they are "all good", and our mixture of qualities allows us to be of benefit even if we haven't mastered certain skills in life. This means that we should try not to hide when we are finding that we are unskilled in something. Instead, we acknowledge lack of skill in some areas and recollect that there are other skills that one has to benefit others in the meantime.

Self Affirmation Part I https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHXo1JbNZ0s