Same Day, Different Views

   After the guided meditation session this morning, a thought came to my mind that this is the last weekend until school starts, and many students are preparing for the back to school grind. I shared with the others that while some people are starting to worry about the rush hour traffic with back to school, others (particularly parents) are rejoicing in the coming year without their kids being at home all day. It's interesting that the very same day (back to school) can mean very different things to different people, depending on the situation and conditions of the looker. If one is truly practicing equanimity, then they will see that no situation is absolutely good or absolutely bad. Everything contains a hidden opportunity, even when at first, it seems to be a loss of some kind.
   Impermanence always feels a little bit daunting. Even on this past Thursday during the sharing, the question was raised, "is there any sense of security in this world?" When a person's mind is agitated and they are not living in the moment, their minds will cling to some idea or thing that they can call enduring or "secure", only to find themselves ruminating and fretting over the idea of what can be secure. In fact, people spend more time worrying about what they can hold onto than enjoying what is in this moment. But if one stops to think about it, change is the opportunity to see that everything has a good and a bad. One of the meditation leaders pointed out on Thursday that even losing a cherished position and role is an opportunity to grow and become something different. For example, the position I have held for many years might seem inseparable from me, but if I were to lose it, there would be a space open to do something else. This doesn't mean that I should recklessly squander what I have (since this would not be mindful), but it suggests that one can look at life in a way that one is not panicking about losing something. One does not, in other words, live in perpetual fear of what they might lose, but sees it more the way a steward might see the property they manage. While I don't own the property, I can enjoy and make the best of protecting it for others.
   Next time you feel anxious, you might ask yourself the question: what am I afraid of losing? Would I die if I lost it? Am I really "losing" after all, or is it just clinging to a fear of losing? And finally, would I be devastated if I were somehow rejected by others? These are the kinds of questions which touch upon impermanence and one's relationship to it. If I can experience impermanence in its fullness, I am no longer afraid of dying, and nor am I afraid to live either.