Illusions of Control

  There is always a tendency to blame oneself when things go wrong, and I have observed this in myself especially. When work is piling up, I tend to overcompensate by doing much more than I am physically capable of taking on at any given time, under the belief that somehow this will "get things under control." In reality, however, this only solidifies the illusion of a self that was in control to begin with.
  During the group meditation tonight, we had this discussion related to how the mind tricks a person into believing that physical attributes which are passed down via evolution can tell people how they choose partners in life. The point of this discussion was in fact to suggest that all thoughts are somewhat delusional, because they are always only partial insights, similar to blind people encountering one part of the elephant. A thought is always by its very nature limited in scope: it cannot innovate or think new thoughts, as it's only one pathway that the brain happens to make. One of the biggest tricks that one's culture plays is in thinking that there is ever an "end" when we finally understand things definitively, thus maintaining a sense of control. In fact, phenomena are constantly subject to change and revision, and the only thing we can do is honor the commitments we have to others as they are happening in this moment.