Mindfulness of Separation

Feelings of separation are really quite complex, and they can take us deep into mystery, but the problem is that a lot of the time, we don't see these separations as relationships with reality. The problem is that we have a very crude vocabulary for describing separation. "Separation" I am talking about has nothing to do with loneliness: it is more about being open to the mysterious and groundless aspect of the world and to the heart itself that is in this wasteland of sorts. It is a strange place, but all too often, we ascribe this feeling of separation to "not having the company of others". The result is that a person in the thrall of this separation anxiety immediately runs toward the first company they can find to drown out the feelings of separation. Because of the way society has taught us to associate feelings of separation with "not enough company", people immediately flock to the crowd as a way of gaining safety from it.
   It's a pity that one doesn't just stay with those feelings for a while to understand the deeper meaning behind them: to behold a kind of immense groundless aspect of being. I can't quite describe it, and sometimes music gets us closer to it, but there is a feeling of having something on the top of one's head but not quite remembering what it is, and then searching and searching for it like a pair of lost keys. But the important thing is that a person needs to balance these immense mysteries with the social identity in which one is able to live and work. That is tricky indeed, because if I go the way of immensity, I will easily get lost in it and might even not come back to any working self. If I go the way of too much "self" in society, I will lose that immensity, and every glimpse of it will make me run for the next social group or support, or task that will remind me of "who I am". In fact, all these tasks I am fulfilling are only tools to allow me to fully relate to this groundless immensity: to do so in a balanced way that allows others to share it and live with it in harmony.