Attitude of Non-Opposing

   Most action stories envision conflict as a contest between two or more people, usually branded as 'good' or 'bad' in some way. I have often felt the pull of feeling that my opinion may be more correct than someone else's, only to realize that the struggle to be 'right' is almost always a source of suffering in itself. Have you ever experienced moments when you felt that your point of view was so right that you were determined to make sure the other person knew it? There is a kind of desire there, which culminates in the satisfaction of feeling that the other was proven to be wrong. But all of this is often just a mask for one's own insecurities and need for control and power. For example, what would happen if instead of trying to correct the person whom I feel is wrong, I let that person do what they need to do, and gently tell them my own perspective or suggestions? Here, the orientation is not about being wrong or right, but about working with the conditions presented to oneself, and trying to empathize with multiple viewpoints.
    It seems helpful, for me anyway, to understand that what I think is 'right' is the result of my own conditions. If I am in a society that tends to support my way of thinking or framework, I am likely to never question myself or my own premises. I might even tend to unconsciously believe that anyone who strays from the pattern of right is a deviant and is therefore a threat to my sense of order, which I inherit from the society itself. There are times in everyone's life, however, when their sense of inviolable right is challenged, whether through being ostracized from a mainstream opinion or group, or coming to lose a precious role in the social order. Outsiders in society often represent this alternative, because they have had the fortune never to fall for the belief that there is a static role to fulfill in the world---one which represents a 'natural' or 'stable' state of things.
   I think that there are several things which need to arise to cultivate this attitude wholeheartedly. The first is to awaken to the fact that my 'right' is just a conditioned dream that is likely to change through opening up to new experiences and perspectives. Therefore, there isn't a need to cling to that view with a sense of 'this is who I am' or 'nobody can change me'. The second attitude is a trust in the way things work out. Sometimes the people who frighten us with their views (right or wrong) are the ones who most stand to teach us the things we may need to know. In particular, people whose views are different from ours can teach us the value of letting go of tenacious clinging to views, as well as the precious value of 'non-views' or not seeing things with a favored point of view. Finally, this kind of attitude requires an insight into the impermanent state of things in general. When I commit to this insight, I am no longer wedded to any view, and I can work with anyone.