Making Decisions

     Recently I have been wondering what are spiritual principles which underpin making decisions, and why are decisions often so hard for me to make. This somewhat poignantly reminds me of a story that my high school biology teacher related to his class, which is that affluent cultures often have children who find it hard to decide what kind of baseball cap they will wear (whose team, etc.) oblivious to the reality that there are people in the world who have to decide how they are going to get food for that day. The point of the story was to suggest that one might need to take a broader perspective on the decision itself before feeling vexed or worried about it.

       It might be helpful to consider the opposite approach: namely, why decisions are hard to make in the first place, and what kinds of attachments might be inherent to that difficulty. We often consider some decisions to be ‘once in a lifetime’ and can lead to a lot of regret in not making them. But it’s important to consider that the decision is really just one of many thoughts that people entertain in the course of a day, and none of these thoughts are permanent. Even though a decision might seem irrevocable or might lead to regret (in taking or not taking the choice), there is always an opportunity to modify the conditions behind the decision somewhere down the road. Causes and conditions are always changing, and even the best-laid plans are bound to change as we progress into new conditions. That being said, it’s probably a good idea not to become overly attached to any meanings one assigns to the decision itself.

       Another principle which I find useful is to treat the decision as something that is arising momentarily, similar to states in meditation. If you think this is a dubious claim, consider a decision you felt compelled to make last year, or the year previous. Are you now feeling the consequences of that intensity? Chances are that in majority of cases, one accommodates to choices made. This means that over time, the feelings of bliss (“I made the best decision!”), relief (“thank heavens I didn’t take that other choice!”) and regret (“I wish I took that other choice”) are bound to die down as one begins to realize that the decision and its conditions have already passed, and one has to face the consequences of choices previously made. Perhaps the meditative approach might be to discover the process of going through a decision, with an open state of awareness, not attaching to doubtful thoughts.

     I am going to venture that, aside from doing something socially irresponsible or reckless, there are few conscious choices or decisions that are so catastrophic that they cannot be modified over time, or at least tolerated. People have a capacity for resilience and for buckling down when there is increased pressure, as well as acting effectively when there is an emergency. Doing and going through the choice itself are often much smoother than the decision making process itself, since the latter might involve considering a whole lot of unknowns which may or may not necessarily arise in the course of performing a project or task.