What Phenomena Could Be

 During the group meditation tonight, I felt somehow influenced by Huayen to see things in a different way. What I thought were once pains I could now see were just particulars in a total, shifting context, or a scene that is forever changing and interpenetrating with other scenes. What I have often thought to be bothersome thoughts, I could now also contextualize as something that is part of an unfolding perfect picture.
     What does that mean, to see things as already perfect the way they are? I think that in order to really do so, a person has to shake their fixed points of reference to the point where things are allowed to be seen as perfect. What I mean by this is that seeing imperfection is the result of a self-reference. When I see something as 'not perfect', what do I use to gauge its imperfection? Typically, I use the previous memories, my past feelings about the thing, and my expectations of what it should be or look like. But what would happen if there were simply no fixed reference point for this phenomena? What if the mind was so clear and unattached that there were simply no rules about how to judge an experience? Could one not then begin to see that 'imperfection' is a relative concept? Once imperfection is rooted out of awareness (or is no longer an attachment), what is left is the sense that things are happening for exactly the conditions that come before it. And in that sense there is a kind of full acceptance of what is happening as the result of conditions that arose prior, without the sense that things should somehow be a different way.
      Can anyone really experience this? It's hard to do so, and maybe only an enlightened person can. The most I could do (and not very much) was to just know that thoughts have already disappeared as soon as they have arisen, so there is just no need to judge the past according to the present thoughts. The other experience is the awareness that particular phenomena are not interfering with mind at all. Typically, meditation is characterized as stilling the mind. But if phenomena are mutually vital to the present moment, is there anything that really needs to be stilled? Perhaps the only thing that is stilled is the sense that thoughts are continuous and even 'compete' with each other, when in fact, they don't do this kind of thing at all.
        By acknowledging that thoughts can co-exist in harmony, it's possible to establish a different relationship to one's thoughts. Rather than seeing thoughts are 'competing' for control or attention, is it possible to see thoughts as waves in the same ocean of mind? If that is the case, is there ever a 'best' thought? Or is it possible to reframe thinking itself as something that does not pick and choose thoughts but sees them all as simply impermanent forms of mind? I feel that this attitude might allow the mind to harmonize with thinking, even very chaotic thinking, as long as it is not attached to specific thought forms.