Looking at Health and Illness

               I remember reading an article by Master Sheng Yen about how, when he went to a specialist, the specialist told him that he had found many impurities in Shifu’s blood. While this seemed to be alarming at first, the doctor later explained that all bodies have some kind of impurities within them, and that it is a natural part of life for bodies to break down in some places. Master Sheng Yen used this example to suggest that the body is a place where impurity is bound to occur. Even with the best of intentions, a person can still develop different illnesses or imbalances at any given time.

               

              As I read this passage recently, I wondered what it means from the daily perspective of life. In some respects, as strange as it seems, I think that it means that one can appreciate both health and illness. When I see the body functioning well and can enjoy strength of health, I can appreciate the way it’s been able to balance itself and clear away any obstructions. I can appreciate the ways that it has helped me function up to this point in my life. On the other hand, when the body is not well, I can also appreciate the fact that this is a sign of the body being impermanent, as are all human being’s bodies. In other words, I don’t blame myself, or think that I am somehow not supposed to have this bodily state happen to me. I try to see it as a natural experience that connects me with all human beings. In this way, I let go of feelings of self-blaming, or regret. I see the body’s state as always pointing to the impermanent, always fragile state of all things.

         

              Is it not often the case that people often only appreciate things when they lose them or they are in danger of losing them? I don’t know. I think that there are ways to better appreciate one’s physical and mental health. Perhaps the most important way would be to make life simpler. Having fewer desires for personal power, or fame, or great amounts of success, might be one way to be able to appreciate what is in front of a person, including one’s body. But appreciation does not keep the body from becoming ill. If I am over-attached to keeping the body in a particular state of being, this only makes the pain seem even worse. And it attaches a self to this body, as though this image I have of the body is ‘me’. Actually, this is just a thought of who I am. In that moment, it is definitely not me at all. It doesn’t mean that one shouldn’t take care of the body, since this is essential to a good sitting meditation practice. But it means that one should not think one is limited to the current image one has of the body as ‘myself’.

Just tonight, I talked to my previous gym trainer from years ago about the imbalances I felt in my low back. He was explaining to me how he too had also the same problems with his back, being in the construction business now. He even explained to me that he feels terrible when doing core exercises, even when he knows it has to be done. I was initially surprised, but also realized that nobody escapes from pain, even a person who has the highest level of strength. And it is something like a going concern. It doesn’t end just from achieving a certain level of fitness.